


When Will the Stars Rain Down from the Heavens?

by orphan_account



Category: The Grisha Trilogy - Leigh Bardugo
Genre: 20 something !alina, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Also dark!alina au, Also..., Daddy Issues, EVEN THOUGH THEY'RE NOT REALLY RELATED!!!, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Major Character Injury, Parent/Child Incest, baby!alina, baghra is a bitch, but they don't stay dead!, darkles is old af as always, ok and the darkling is raising alina as his daughter for like... a long ass time., ok so, please read these thoroughly., pls don't read this if you can't handle some really triggering situations, putting that warning there for further chapters, sighs, so technically... - Freeform, teen!alina, they do die (both of them), they're cute af
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-14
Updated: 2019-07-17
Packaged: 2020-03-05 12:16:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death, Underage
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,793
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18828514
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: He wants to be the biggest sin she's ever committed, she doesn't want his absolution.





	1. We Are Infinite (a beginning and an end)

**Author's Note:**

> *deep breath* I will say this one time! This story will cover a variety of topics. There will be some cute moments but there will also be soul-crushing angst. There will be smut!

She has him in her arms . She has a lot of things: guilt, doubt and fear among them. 

 

The Darkling… well she’s choking back sobs. His breathing is shallow and she’s holding him in the circle of her arms. 

 

“M-my name. Say my name,” he begs her. 

 

“Aleksander,” she whispers his name on her lips like she is speaking to the saints. 

 

“I love you. I-I have always l-loved you, my Alina,” her sobs come more freely now. She knows this will be her martyrdom. She doesn’t want it, it tastes bitter in her mouth. Saints, if they knew what he did for her, it might be his too. 

 

He lies there in the sand, blood pours from his chest into the sand. Half a millennium’s worth of life and memories washing away. She has no power, no use for herself. 

 

Maybe they didn’t love the darkness… but Alina had never been afraid of the dark. No, he’d proven to her that there would be no light without the darkness. He was more than just the darkness though, he gave her room to shine. 

 

His breathing slowed, and she braced herself for the inevitable. The stillness of his heart, his body starting to cool. 

 

He gripped her hand weakly, “no grave for them to desecrate.” 

 

Alina nodded and brushed his hair out of his face. She felt like she was falling, that the sand was a bottomless pit for her heart to drop through. “I will always remember you,” she whispered. 

 

“As long as there is love and memory there is no true loss,” Aleksander whispered to her. 

 

His last breath left his lungs and she felt the silence, the people staring at her. Nikolai was there, holding out his hand for her. 

 

Alina had always wondered who he loved more, Ravka or her… she now had her answer. 

 

It had always been clear to her who she loved the most though. 

 

She ripped the dagger from his chest and slit her throat. 


	2. been waiting too long

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Darkling finds a sun summoner and, realizing she’s extremely powerful, takes her home to Os Alta

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me be clear when I say this is purely junk food. The Darkling and Alina come back (in the present) next chapter!

*~*~*

 

**17 YEARS AGO**

 

*~*~*

 

The baby cried and wailed. She was still so young that she needed a wet nurse, or better yet, a mother. 

 

No neighbors came to investigate the crying, because there were none, they’d all died defending the town from Shu attackers. 

 

A grisha wearing black and swathed in shadows walked through the dead town. 

 

He was one of two survivors of the attack. One of his guards was still alive although, he didn’t know how, and it was likely due to cowardice. The wailing was becoming a nuisance. He was going to have a lot to explain to the Lantsovs, he pushed the thought from his consciousness. 

 

He sought out the baby, if only to end its suffering, and found a little girl with a tuft of chestnut hair. She couldn’t have been older than a year. 

 

She held one of his fingers, she’d quieted since he’d come close to her. A little pool of light shone from where their hands were joined. A jolt of power surged through him. She was an amplifier, a distant relative. 

 

He held her little hand a fraction harder, more light, warm and bright, came forth. More power funneled into him.

 

He had a conundrum. She was, or could be, a sun summoner. At least she should be brought to an orphanage in Os Alta for grisha. He picked up the baby, the girl giggled. “Da-da.” 

 

The Darkling frowned. She was a beautiful child. She had bright brown eyes and rosy cheeks. 

 

An errant thought crept in and he shook his head, “No, you cannot run a country and contend with the health and wellness of a child.” 

 

He was talking to himself. He didn’t care, there was no one to call him out for it. 

 

He would take the child back with him to Os Alta. 

 

He carried the baby and found the remnants of his coach. His guard was there ready to drive him away to Ravka. It was at least a week’s ride until they could get to Os Alta. The child would starve to death in that time. He sighed. He had only one horse left, and they weren’t even technically  _ in _ Ravka anymore. They were in the rocky part of Shu Han and it was rough going at the best of times. He could get his oprichnik to steal cow’s milk for him… could children this young even drink cow’s milk? 

 

He was about to find out.

 

*~*~*

 

Their ride back to Os Alta was trying. They had to stop multiple times, not only for horses but for food, diapers (which raised some very interesting questions) and rattles, other toys and sometimes just for him to pace and cut a few trees in half. 

 

They arrived in Os Alta almost fifteen days after the battle in Shu Han. 

 

The Darkling went straight to a ragged old hut on the Little Palace grounds. 

 

He was carrying the girl he’d found and he burst into the hut and the old woman there looked like she wanted to cut  _ him _ in half. 

 

“What in the name of _every_ _single_ saint, what is _that_?” 

 

He wanted to protect the girl. He knew he didn’t need Baghra’s blessing, but she was his mother. He couldn’t hide from that. Here he was carrying a baby… an actual infant in his mother’s house, and what had his mother taught him about children? Well, she’d been a shit mother and that was an understatement. What would he be as a father? 

 

The baby began crying. 

 

“She’s an amplifier! Like me! And a Sun Summoner!” 

 

“Grisha don’t develop their powers until at least four or five years old, are you sure?” 

 

“Hold her hand,” Baghra stepped forward and went to touch the baby, “and know if you hurt her I will end you.” 

 

Baghra scoffed. She held the baby’s hand and light flooded the room. It appeared that not only was she a powerful grisha but several good meals had put even more power in her veins

 

“All Saints, boy” she said slowly, and in a tone of voice that he recognized as disappointment. 

 

“I want to name her, I took her from a village near the Shu Han border. She was the only person who survived.” 

 

“You cannot name an infant,” Baghra snarled. 

 

“If she’s mine I can,” The Darkling pushed back. 

 

“She isn’t yours! She’s an orphan!”

 

“It’s fine, you don’t need to have any part in this.”

 

“Boy!”

 

“Goodbye, mother.” He said stepping out into the late spring air.

 

The Darkling had to drop the baby off with a wet nurse and go speak to the king. Lantsov was… a piece of work. Explaining to the king that he needed to spend some time away from the war was going to be difficult. 

 

“Darkling, I heard tell that you’ve brought a child into the Little Palace grounds?”

 

“It is true.”

 

“Are you… the father?”

 

Aleksander paused, and then dove in head first, “Yes.” 

 

The king looked disbelieving for a long moment and then got off his throne and began congratulating the Darkling. 

 

It was slightly maddening to deal with the king after such a long journey. Still, he needed about twenty more years before he could move against the tsar. 

 

Eventually, when he was let go by the king he walked briskly to the nursery. He had a name in mind for her… Alina… it had a nice ring to it. 

 

She was looking so much healthier now and it made his heart jump in his chest. 

 

It would be years before she could begin grisha school and her status as an amplifier would have to be kept a secret. 


	3. never asked me once about the wrong i did

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alina comes into a rather unfortunate birth rite. The Darkling wonders how the hell he's going to make it up to her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OK, IF I MAY HAVE YOUR ATTENTION!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 
> 
> this is a little raunchy, I did put it in there that she knows Aleksander is NOT (LET ME SAY IT AGAIN FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK, *****NOT *****) HER FATHER. it's a little brief but this is supposed to be pure fantasy content. 
> 
> Going forward the flashbacks will be shorter chapters and the present day will be lengthier. 
> 
> Please do not read if you do not like. Heed the tags!

**Chapter 2**

 

**Present**

 

Of fucking course, they would think to bury her, their Sankta. She remembers that being underground will not kill her.

 

She tested her power, the light comes to her and she lets it blaze into the cold light of the cut. If she still had her power then things were moving in the right direction.

 

She climbs out of the casket and sees that Nikolai had followed her instructions to perfection. She’d said that if anything ever happened to her she would want to be buried in the Grand Palace garden, so she would always be watching over him.

 

It hadn’t been entirely a lie, but the Grand Palace garden was entirely private and locked. _A good place to come back to life._

 

She felt the coolness of shadows at her back, arms wrapped around her and she shivered slightly at his touch.

 

“It’s good to be home,” Aleksander’s silky voice purred in her ear.

 

“How?” She gasped.

 

“I’m the Black Heretic. The Demon in the Wood, and whatever other titles you wish to bestow on me. I am made of all things, does darkness ever die?”

 

“No, of course not.”

 

“Will you take him off the throne tonight?”

 

“He’s sick. Probably dying. I owe him a clean death.”

 

“Apparently you don’t owe me that though.” He turned and stalked in front of her, unbuttoned his kefta and showed him the scar from his shoulder to his navel.

 

She looked away. The memories of his last breaths played behind her eyes.

 

“I want to go home.”

 

“Me too.”

 

“Let’s turn this place upside down.”

 

The next several hours they fought friend and foe. This is what everything had been building up to.

 

She almost felt bad when she killed Nikolai. It was hard, he was one of the last people she had ever wanted to kill. But it had been mercy more than anything else. The Darkling had caught them kissing through the tether and he had turned Nikolai into nichevo’ya and then returned him to human. Nikolai had never been the same.

 

The grisha sided with them, it was how things were supposed to be.

 

*~*~*~*

 

For about the past month Alina had been having some extremely uncomfortable dreams about the Darkling.

 

She supposed it was just stress, pretending to hate the man who loved her beyond a shadow of a doubt was a big task.

 

At first, she had dreamed of the Darkling’s death. Which had left her shaking and crying and very much alone, how was she supposed to tell anyone?

 

Then the dreams had moved on to things she and the Darkling had gotten up to while she was still at the Little Palace, the first time she kissed him… the first time they did more than kiss…

 

Her dreams became progressively raunchier until she realized she was waking up having soaked through her panties.

 

Luckily Nikolai was not around for her shame when she reached between her legs and got herself off, thinking about the Darkling the whole time. His porcelain skin, the smooth expanse of his lithe body…

 

Alina rubbed her thighs together, desperate for friction. It was nighttime. Her head hurt. The Darkling was in the room adjacent to hers, it wouldn’t be hard to wake him up… she sighed and rucked up her nightgown. She didn’t want to bother him.

 

Tomorrow was her eighteenth birthday…

 

She laid back and circled her clit mechanically, she was having a hard time getting herself off lately. And tonight, when she tried it just made her feel exponentially emptier than she had minutes before.

 

The small clock on the table next to her bed said it was quarter past two in the morning. She hummed happy birthday to herself and eventually dozed back to sleep.

 

*~*~*~*

 

When she woke she knew something was desperately wrong.

 

She felt like she had a fever, a really bad fever and there was a pool of stickiness between her legs. Oh, she had no time for this bullshit!

 

She rang for a servant and got cleaned up, only to realize there was something even more wrong with her than she’d thought. Nothing smelled right, and she felt like she was going to be sick.

 

Feeling green around the gills and generally miserable was not how she wanted to spend her first day as _tsaritsa_.

 

“ _Good grief_ ,” the Darkling unceremoniously opened his door. “Who the _blazes_ let an omega— Alina?”

 

He looked like a worried dad. She hated that look. Probably because he wasn’t her dad, and even though he had posed as one for the greater part of her life she still resented him a little for it.

 

“I feel sick, like I’m about to die sick,” Alina said shakily. He smelled… like winter wind and pine trees and musk. It was doing things to her head and she felt her clit swell painfully with arousal.

 

“You’re—" he inhaled sharply, “Alina we need to talk.”

 

Alina felt so empty, so sick, “maybe I just need to eat something?”

 

“No— get in my room and don’t move. Do not go anywhere near anyone else.”

 

The Darkling began issuing orders and servants began bringing towels and fresh water… and condoms?

 

What the actual fuck.

 

She sighed and laid down.

 

When the servants were done bringing whatever supplies a sick person needed the Darkling reentered. He took a shaky breath.

 

“There’s something I didn’t think would be a problem and is _apparently_ a huge problem.”

 

“Just tell me Aleksander.”

 

“There’s a certain part of grisha physiology that isn’t covered in classes because it’s so rare. There is a kind of hierarchy within the grisha that no one speaks about, besides the orders. The rankings are alpha, beta, and omega. Betas are the most common, alphas are… somewhat less common and omegas are extremely rare. I’m one of the last alphas in the world, there was one in Shu Han a couple of decades ago but she died. And I have never, in my five hundred years, known an omega. I’ve heard rumors of them… but nothing beyond whispers. Alina you’re at a huge risk right now because you’re an omega and I believe you’re in heat.”

 

“So this has to do with?”

 

“Sex,” Aleksander flushed.

 

Alina wilted, “I’m scared, there were notes about alphas and omegas in your grandfather’s journals. It said that omegas can die if they go into heat alone—“

 

“I didn’t realize he’d written about that.”

 

“Can’t you just get a beta in here and… and….”

 

“Let you fuck them for a straight week?”

 

“A week!” She squeaked.

 

“No Alina, only an alpha can make it so… so your body doesn’t go into shock.”

 

She swallowed hard.

 

“I love you, Alina, and we have forever to talk about this. I will do anything to make up for it but I will not let you have your eternity stolen from you by some ridiculous ancient grisha breeding rite.”

 

She let out a sob, she was desperately uncomfortable because her clit was throbbing painfully.

 

The Darkling may have grown somewhat softer in his years raising Alina but he was still… what all the bedtime stories said he was. A creature of nightmares.

 

“Get on the bed Alina, I’ll make it quick. You’ll need to… sleep here every night and we’ll have to… every night but I promise it won’t hurt. I mean- you already- you and Nikolai?”

 

“No,” she said, “it never happened because you _teased_ me so much about being a peninsula!”

 

Aleksander has the decency to look abashed.

 

“Alina you’re going to be ill if you don’t get on the bed and…”

 

“And fuck you?” She whimpered.

 

He had the decency to blush faintly.

 

She crawled into the bed and touched his arm, “just be gentle.”

 

“Ok.” He waved his hands and her nightgown was nothing but shadows dissipating in the morning light.

 


	4. Undisovered

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just tread with caution

*~*~*~*

 

**Chapter 3**

 

**13 years ago**

 

*~*~*~*

 

She turns five today, she’s had some accidental mishaps with her power. She accidentally cut her favorite doll in half because she didn’t get a cookie after her lunch about a month ago. 

 

She was… spoiled rotten and the Darkling loved it. He’d never wanted a child until Alina came along and shook him out of his stupor. 

 

“Daddy?” Alina struggled to get the latch on the Darklings door. “Daddy it’s my birthday!”

 

He’d given her his birthday since there was no real way to know her own. So consequently he was turning five hundred and eleven today, not that he bothered to celebrate anymore. 

 

Alina eventually got the latch on his door and crawled into his bed. She tugged on his inky black hair, “it’s time to get up.” 

 

“Daddy was up late wrapping presents for his favorite little girl.”

 

She pouted, “I’m your only little girl.”

 

He huffed and ruffled her hair, now almost down to her back, “what do you want to do today?”

 

“I want to summon!!” 

 

Aleksander deflated. She was getting more and more powerful as the years went on. Hell, by the time she turned eighteen she might be more powerful than him! The thought was unsettling. 

 

“Maybe, don’t you want to play with your friends?”

 

She huffed and piece of her long hair floated into the air, “the only person who wants to play with me is Genya and you don’t like her…”

 

“Genya is a very nice little girl, but maybe you should play with some of the corporalki?”

 

“They’re creepy!” Alina said, making a face. 

 

He sighed and hauled himself out of bed. The Darkling was tired, and a little hungover. He’d had drinks with a grisha woman, he’d taken as a lover and it had been a little too much fun. He’d kicked her out before the end of the night though, he knew even though Alina wasn’t strictly allowed in his room, she would find a way in. 

 

“Daddy?”

 

“Yes, solnishka?”

 

“Why don’t I have a mommy?”

 

The Darkling sighed, “am I not enough for you? You have me.”

 

Alina didn’t like the sound of that… “well… Genya said that boys can’t have babies and that I must have a mother somewhere.” 

 

The Darkling swallowed hard, “I’ll tell you when you’re older.”

 

She frowned but let it go. 

 

*~*~*~*

 

The Darkling watched as she grew from a child into a preteen and he hoped she was alright. He could see her heart hardening as people discovered her power. 

 

And then, there was  _ The Incident _ . 

 

An older boy, probably close to graduation from grisha school tried to stop her heart, to use her bones as an amplifier. The Darkling didn’t know how it had gotten out but he suspected Genya. 

 

She cut him in half in her panic. 

 

There was a huge debate about whether or not it was safe for the other children to be around her. The Darkling argued the opposite, it was not safe for her to be around them. 

 

Alina was beside herself, and he had no idea how to comfort her. After all, it had been that kind of betrayal that ruined his heart for over 500 years. 

 

She was crying in his lap tonight, afraid to go to bed because she was afraid she was going to be hurt in her sleep. 

 

“Daddy, I’m scared.” She said tearfully. 

 

He brushed her hair with a small gold brush, “you shouldn’t be. I’ll protect you, you are always safe when you’re with me.”

 

“But you have to run the Second Army!” Tears shook her small frame, “you can’t protect me all the time, I have to learn to protect myself and I’m just a kid.” 

 

He pulled her in close, Saints, he would love to do some terrible things to the boy who had tried to end her life. Alina had given him a clean death which was more than he deserved. 

 

“Would you like to take more lessons with Baghra?”

 

“N-no. She doesn’t like me.” 

 

The Darkling sighed. Of course, of course, Baghra would make his daughter feel like crap. Just like she had made him into a monster. 

 

“Alina, you’re going to be fine, are you afraid of your power?” The Darkling asked tentatively. 

 

She curled into his shoulder, “I am, I don’t want to hurt people but I also don’t want people to hurt me!”

 

The Darkling didn’t know what to say, so he gave her a mild sleeping remedy from the healers and laid her down. 

 

He wanted to give her the world, but it wasn’t his to give. 

 

He slept fitfully that night 

 

*~*~*~*

 

Alina went to school the next day, expecting things to be difficult. She was expecting a lot things from her classmates but she was not expecting Genya to come up to her and declare that they couldn’t be friends if she knew how to cut people in half. 

 

Her one friend… 

 

Genya was walking away, frightened and scared when Alina began to glow. 

 

“Oh Saints, she’s going to kill us all!” Zoya, a squaller a couple of years above her, shouted. 

 

“I’m not going to hurt anyone!” Alina whimpered. 

 

“Yeah right!” A boy in red said. 

 

She heard voices in the background but her ears were ringing with the force of her power. 

 

Someone shouted to get the Darkling. 

 

She was burning, burning, about to eviscerate herself. There was more shouting and Alina’s eyes hurt, she felt like she was flying, she was dying. 

 

“Alina,  _ solnishka _ , calm down.” And then she wasn’t burning anymore. She was swathed in a wave of cool shadows. 

 

It was just her and the Darkling in the shadows. 

 

“Y-you saved me… I thought I was going to become the sun.” 

 

“I will always save you.” 

 

“I don’t want to go to school with these kids anymore. I want to go on campaign with you.” 

 

The Darkling hesitated, “Maybe, when you’re older.” 

 

She hung her head, “you say I can do everything ‘when I’m older.’”

 

“You’re only thirteen.” 

 

“I’m powerful. I know it! I can see it by the way the other kids look at me, like I’m going to grow up to be like you and they’re all terrified of you.” 

 

The Darkling grinned, “There are no others like us Alina.” 

 

“You can take the shadows away.” 

 

“Use your light to cut through them.” 

 

She pouted, “I don’t know how, without hurting you.” 

 

“Just let a little light out.”

 

Alina scrunched up her face, trying to make her power smaller, smaller, smaller. And then let out (what she thought) was a tiny bit of light. 

 

It was a strong sunbeam and they were both blinded by it, but no one was hurt. 

 

“Alina we have to do something about your control.” The Darkling said as he tucked her into bed after trying to get her to get a grip on her light. 

 

Alina yawned, she was tired from practicing so much, “Daddy I love you, thanks for saving me today.” She said, too sleepy to answer him properly. 

 

His cheeks warmed, “I love you too, little one.” 

 

The Darkling left her room and fell into a fitful sleep. 

**Author's Note:**

> Any comments/kudos/general fangirling is much loved.


End file.
